| Testimony |
Cross-examination |
My
secret life under 'don't ask, don't tell'
By Joan E. Darrah, Special to CNN February 4, 2010 12:01
p.m. EST |
Romans 1:26-27
For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women
changed the natural use into that which is against
nature. and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were
consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and
receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error. |
|
Editor's note: Retired Navy Capt. Joan E.
Darrah served 29½ years as a naval intelligence officer and was chief of staff
and deputy commander at the Office of Naval Intelligence. She has received several
awards: three Legion of Merits, three Meritorious Service Medals, three Navy
Commendation Medals and the Navy Achievement Medal. Darrah lives with her partner
of 19 years, Lynne Kennedy, in Alexandria, Virginia. |
This woman has a sad story to tell. First, she
joined the Navy. That's
sad.
Then she chose to hide the fact that her best friend was a woman. If I had to
punish my 14-year old daughter for intolerably rude insubordination and
disobedience by grounding her from a concert or looked-forward-to event, she would
be sad staying at home on the night of the event, and I would be sad that she was
sad, but disobedience has consequences. This woman's punishment is self-imposed.
Joan Darrah could have had an open friendship with Lynne Kennedy. But she had
declared war on "The
Laws of Nature and of Nature's God." God defines "marriage"
as a relationship between a man and a woman. Darrah defiantly wanted to claim that
her relationship with a woman was equal to a "marriage." The Navy does
not allow that claim to be made, so Darrah had to keep her relationship a secret
in order to keep her job in the Navy. Her story is in the column at left, our
response is in this column. |
| |
|
| (CNN) -- When I first joined the Navy, I
had no idea that I was gay. |
This is a propagandistic statement,
evidence of cultural brainwashing, uttered in an attempt to brainwash others. The
statement intends to convey as "fact" the idea that a person is
or can be homosexual before such an "idea" or choice is
formed in the heart, soul, mind, or will. This is like saying, "When I first
started teaching kindergarten, I had no idea I was a child molester." |
| I was well into my career when I realized this
fact, but I was doing well as evidenced by the awards and promotions I was
receiving. |
The decision to repudiate the way God
created human beings is not a "fact," it is a choice. |
| In addition, I really enjoyed what I was doing
and felt I was making a difference. So I opted to continue to serve, even though I
knew that I would have to hide my true identity. |
I'll bet that when a person signs up
for the Navy, a promise is made to abide by Navy rules. Clearly, Ms. Darrah knew
that it was against Navy rules to engage in homosexual behavior, but she chose to
"hide" her insubordination rather than make a choice to cease violating
Navy rules, or leave the Navy. It's not just that she violated a Navy order and
refused to say "I'm sorry" or accept the consequences. She deliberately
chose to maintain an on-going continuing violation of Navy rules.
This may be why 97% of military brass opposed Clinton's unconstitutional,
pro-homosexual interference in military affairs back in 1993: When a person
chooses to disregard "The
Laws of Nature and of Nature's God" at one point, that person has chosen in
principle to disregard all laws by disregarding the Lawmaker. This is what
makes a homosexual dangerous in an institution where obedience to authority is
critical.
|
| For most of my career in the Navy,
I lived two lives and went to work each day wondering if that would be my last.
Whenever the admiral would call me to his office, 99.9 percent of me was certain
that it was to discuss an operational issue. But there was always that fear in the
back of my mind that somehow I had been "outed," and he was calling me
to his office to tell me that I was fired. |
It is apparent that hiding an ongoing
violation of Navy policy destroys "esprit de corps." Guilt and suspicion
cause hesitation and second-thoughts, interfering with the rapid obedience
required in the military. |
| So many simple things that straight people take
for granted could have ended my career, even a comment such as "My partner
and I went to the movies last night." |
Saying "My best friend and I
went to the movies last night" would not end her career in the Navy. But she
insisted on saying, "I went to the movies last night with someone with whom I
violate Navy policy and The
Laws of Nature and of Nature's God in a systematic, on-going manner." |
| In spite of the stress of living under "don't
ask, don't tell" and the constant fear of losing my job, somehow my
partner, Lynne Kennedy, an openly gay reference librarian at the Library of
Congress, and I had learned to deal with the policy and make the requisite
sacrifices. |
Except the sacrifice of actually
obeying Navy rules against homosexual conduct. |
- I had pretended to be straight and played the games most gays in the
military are all too familiar with --
- • not daring to have a picture of Lynne on my desk,
- • being reluctant to go out to dinner with her,
- • telling her not to call me at work except in a real emergency,
- • not going to church together,
- • avoiding shopping for groceries together
- • and generally staying out of sight of anyone I knew when we were
together.
- I didn't want to have to lie about who Lynne was or have someone conclude
that we were more than casual friends.
|
None of these things would have
been prohibited if Darrah did not insist on her right to publicly violate The
Laws of Nature and of Nature's God, and to defy God's institution of marriage.
They didn't have to be "no more than casual friends"; they could have
been really, really close friends, as long as they weren't claiming that they had
a right to violate The Laws
of Nature and of Nature's God, and to defy God's institution of marriage. |
| But it was the events of September
11, 2001, that caused me to appreciate fully the true impact of "don't
ask, don't tell" on our lives. |
What follows is not the impact of
"Don't Ask, Don't Tell" (or more accurately, the policy against
homosexuality), it is the impact of Darrah's attempt to conceal on-going
insubordination. |
| At 8:30 a.m. on September 11, I went to a meeting
in the Pentagon. At 9:30 a.m. I left that meeting. At 9:37 a.m., American Airlines
Flight No. 77 slammed into the Pentagon and destroyed the exact space I had left
less than eight minutes earlier, killing seven of my colleagues. |
|
| In the days and weeks that followed, I went to
several funerals and memorial services for shipmates who had been killed. Most of
my co-workers attended these services with their spouses whose support was
critical at this difficult time, yet I was forced to go alone. |
"Forced" only by her own
defiance of God's Law and Navy law. She was unwilling to be "very close
friends," insisting on a perverse substitute for marriage and the right to
attack God's Law. |
| As the numbness began to wear off, it hit me how
incredibly alone Lynne would have been had I been killed. The military is known
for how it pulls together and helps people; we talk of the "military
family," which is a way of saying we always look after each other, especially
in times of need. But none of that support would have been available for Lynne,
because under "don't ask, don't tell," she couldn't exist. |
She could have existed as Darrah's
"best friend," just not as Darrah's "husband" or
"wife." |
| In fact, Lynne would have been one of the last
people to know had I been killed, because nowhere in my paperwork or emergency
contact information had I dared to list her name. |
Darrah certainly could have listed
her name, but chose not to because she chose to engage perpetually in conduct
"unbecoming an officer." |
| This realization caused us to stop and reassess
exactly what was most important in our lives. During that process, we realized
that the "don't ask, don't tell" policy was causing us to make a much
bigger sacrifice than either of us had ever admitted. Eight months later, in June
2002, I retired after more than 29 years in the U.S. Navy, an organization I will
always love and respect. |
Love and respect, but not obey. |
| We are now committed to doing everything we
possibly can to get rid of "don't ask, don't tell" so that our military
can finally be open to all qualified and motivated individuals who want to serve
their country. |
A person who is serving perverse
lusts rather than God cannot serve their country, if their country is a nation
"under God." |
| As a retired naval officer, I am especially
pleased with the leadership that Navy Adm. Michael
Mullen, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, has demonstrated on repeal of
"don't ask, don't tell." I believe that the end of the policy is in
sight. I have every confidence that our military will easily adjust to this change
and that with strong leadership, we will ultimately be stronger and better for it. |
Permitting and even approving
continued violation of The
Laws of Nature and of Nature's God does not make an institution
"stronger" or "better." |
| Ironically, it was in the military that I learned
to work with people of different backgrounds, different religions, different
ethnicities and different skin colors and to focus on getting the mission
accomplished. I learned the importance of respecting everyone and judging people
on their performance and abilities, not on a preconceived prejudice. |
The
Laws of Nature and of Nature's God are not simply a "prejudice."
This is not a matter of personal taste or even social convention. Human beings are
created by God male and female. God has explained this situation to us. This issue
of ethics and morality is fundamental to who we are as human beings. The
Declaration of Independence is not a mere "prejudice." This issue here
is not "bigotry," "prejudice," or even military policy. The
issue is, What is the nature of the human species; what is the reality of
morality. The issue is nothing less than whether America is a nation "under
God" or a nation at war with God. The issue is much bigger than Darrah
and her friend. |
| Twenty-six countries allow gays to serve openly
in their militaries, and from all reports, things are going just fine. This is the
right step for our country, our military and for gay people both currently serving
and those who would like to be part of the world's finest military. I have great
love and respect for our country, but I know we can do better than "don't
ask, don't tell." |
"Repent"
will always be better than "don't ask, don't tell." |
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The opinions in this commentary are solely those of Joan
E. Darrah. |
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